An address given in the Hamilton Pool Ward August 18, 2019 by Summer Owens
I grew up following my dad around the house hoping to participate in whatever project he had going on. Ours was a do it yourself household. Something was always being worked on and I wanted in on the action. To my dad’s credit he never denied me when I asked if I could help. Over the years under his tutelage I used power tools, laid flooring, painted walls, repaired shingles, and did all sorts of odd jobs. I never felt limited by age or gender and his patience helped me develop an insatiable curiosity about how things are built and how I can repair or improve them. My mother was the same. She always took the opportunity to teach me when I expressed interest. She taught me how to bake, how to can, and how to plant and care for a garden, in spite of her busy career as a computer programmer. Both of my parents helped cultivate in me a tenacity and confidence in my ability to learn. And when it comes to new situations or tasks I usually feel, if not fully qualified, at least capable of quickly becoming so. This can do attitude has been a great blessing and strength in my life but it has also occasionally caused trouble. As regarding the concept of grace, for instance.
In a speech given at BYU, religious scholar Stephen E. Robinson described a time early in his marriage when his wife Janet seemed to be, as he called it, “dying spiritually”. When she finally opened up to him she exclaimed that she just couldn’t do all of it anymore. She started listing the ways in which she was failing and comparing herself to others. She concluded by telling her husband that she was not perfect, never would be, and would never make it to the celestial kingdom. In relaying this story Brother Robinson then wrote, “Who would have thought...after all we had read and done in the Church...that Janet did not know the gospel of Jesus Christ?... She knew why Jesus is a coach, a cheerleader, an advisor, a teacher... the head of the Church, the Elder Brother, or even God…. but she did not understand why he is called the Savior. Janet was trying to save herself with Jesus as an advisor. Brothers and sisters, we can’t. No one can.”
1
Like Janet, it took me many years to recognize that living the gospel is not a Do It Yourself project. I knew that because of the Savior’s grace all men and women would be raised to immortality but I had a hard time reconciling grace with exaltation. How do we resolve the idea that we don’t earn eternal life when we are taught that works are necessary to salvation?
For me, coming to understand the conundrum of grace versus works, was a matter of viewing it in light of one word: qualify.
To qualify for something one must achieve the skill, knowledge, or ability for doing or being something. Becoming qualified for exaltation, doesn’t entitle us to it, but it does give us the opportunity to receive it whereas if we never even qualify for it we
cannot receive it. Not because of some arbitrary punishment God has made up, but because
He will not counteract our will. If we don’t use our agency to live celestial laws then we don’t actually desire celestial glory. Nor do I personally believe we would find joy living in a place whose laws we could not keep and whose ideals we do not agree with. Hence
D&C 88:22 which reads, “For he who is not able to abide the law of a celestial kingdom cannot abide a celestial glory.”
It really is true then that we are judged according to the desires of our hearts. Our actions demonstrate what we desire and in turn build the competency needed to qualify for the responsibilities of exaltation. (
D&C 137:9) The catch is that in spite of our best desires and actions, we can’t qualify for it, let alone earn it. We must achieve nothing less than perfection and we never can. But this is where the concept of qualification becomes so beautiful. The word qualify has an additional meaning. In the legal sense, if you qualify an agreement that means that you will modify, limit, or restrict your agreement by presenting exceptions. We actually can qualify for exaltation but we can only do so with and because of the Great Qualifier, the exception God agreed upon to the demands of justice, even Jesus Christ. Said he, “For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent;” (
D&C 19:16)
Elder D. Todd Christofferson has taught: “Christ died not to save indiscriminately but to offer repentance. We rely “wholly upon the merits of him who is mighty to save” in the process of repentance, but acting to repent is a self-willed change. So by making repentance a condition for receiving the gift of grace, God enables us to retain responsibility for ourselves."
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Repentance is a gift that preserves our agency and works to qualify us for greater things, yet it is widely misunderstood.
It is not a punishment and if it feels like one we may be enacting penance instead of acting to repent. Guilt is not meant to be used like a crowbar to beat ourselves in a misguided attempt to atone for our own sins. It is meant to leverage us toward Christ. Do you realize that when you set yourself up as an exception to the Lord’s redeeming power, you have set yourself up as being wiser than He? The moment I realized this was perhaps the most humbling and liberating of my life. It allowed me to experience repentance for the first time as a precious gift that could restore my peace and joy. It enabled me to separate the sin from the sinner and believe that though I don’t always make the best of choices, that doesn’t make me the worst kind of person. It allowed me to finally accept His forgiveness and believe it. The berating, rebuking, and lambasting of myself for every mistake dissolved and in its place was hope, something infinitely more productive. I cannot adequately express the joy I have since found in living the gospel and in my relationship with and love of my savior.
While we may not always commit sin that requires priesthood help, we all have need of regular repentance.
President Nelson has taught: “While the Lord insists on our repentance, most people don’t feel such a compelling need. They include themselves among those who try to be good. They have no evil intent. Yet the Lord is clear in His message that all need to repent—not only from sins of commission but from sins of omission…. Repentance is conversion! A repentant soul is a converted soul, and a converted soul is a repentant soul.”
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The provision of the sacrament indicates it is expected we will sin. But that fact does not absolve us of the responsibility to try not to. As we complete necessary ordinances, attempt to avoid sin, repent when we don’t, and actively work to develop Christlike character we claim Christ as our advocate and
He is bound to honor our claim. For he has said, “...I give unto you directions how you may act before me, that it may turn to you for your salvation. I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say…” (
D&C 82:9-10)
Brothers and Sisters, this is the good news of the gospel. That we really are free to choose for ourselves. That if we choose Christ He makes up where we lack. Just as parents guide their children in learning the skills and confidence necessary for adult life, Christ will guide us in learning the skills and confidence necessary for eternal life and our hearts will be purified in the process. What may begin as acting with the hope of celestial reward becomes acting with the hope of rewarding others, regardless of whether it will do anything for you. You will work to expand your understanding of doctrine so you can teach. You will reinforce and share your testimony hoping it might provide kindling for someone else’s. You will strive to offer forgiveness to the repentant. You will know from whence you came and whose you are and that will empower you with a confidence born of humility to affect much good within your family and your community.
I know Heavenly Father exists and that he loves his children. I know Christ lives, that he died for me and lives for me. I have experienced for myself the joy that comes from following His commandments and trying to live like Him. I share this witness in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
[1]
Believing Christ: A Practical Approach to the Atonement by Stephen E. Robinson
[2]
Free Forever, to Act for Themselves by D. Todd Christofferson
[3]
Repentance and Conversion by Russell M. Nelson
