Reactions to children

I have many reasons for staying at home with my kids. When I say “at home” I don’t just mean the fact that I do not work. I mean staying inside. There are days, many days, that I do not want to leave the house with three children. But I strongly believe children need plenty of sunshine and outdoor play time and since we are apartment dwellers without a yard, I must take them out to play. Playtime is the least of my troubles.
Trying to shop with three children? That’s a whole other ball game. I only go to stores that have the giant carts with buckled seats for two toddlers and a place on the cart to put a car seat. Even in these carts, shopping can get harry. But I do it because … well…actually I’m not sure why I put myself through the madness. I hate going out late at night for one thing and of course I often get frustrated at those bold enough to make comments about my misbehaving children.
But more than that, I am frustrated with the reaction people often have to my having 3 children in the first place.
Whenever I go somewhere it is almost inevitable to get one of the following comments:
“Are they all yours?” – This surprises me I guess because I come from a family of five and my husband from a family of 13. Three doesn’t seem like that many kids to me
“You have your hands full, you’re done right?” – Again a comment along the lines of 3 being a lot and surely you don’t want any more children do you?
“Oh, well you’ve got one of each, now you can be done.” This one I think bothers me most. I didn’t just have my second son because we were trying for a girl. Am I happy I got a little girl the third time around? Sure, but I would have loved another boy just as much.
What these comments say to me: Children are such a hardship, don’t have anymore than you have to, especially if you’ve already got one of each.
Most of my days are busy and messy and exhausting. My hands are full, but so is my heart. Children are beautiful, innocent angels, still so close to God. The love and joy they bring me far outweighs the amount of time and work I must put into teaching them.
Don’t tell me that they are a hardship, or that I should only have them until I get the gender I want. You disrespect them by so saying.
I am so thankful for the sacred gift of my little ones. I hope those who think otherwise are far and few between.